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  Jane The following testimonies demonstrate the manifestation of the Holy Spirit in the gifts of healing and miracles today. In these testimonies from the files of Wellspring Ministries names have been changed at the discretion of the client. “When I started the telephone ministry at Wellspring, I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome for the past 10 years. I was also suffering from herniated disc and tendonitis in both arms and wrists. I soon learned the autoimmune diseases are from the root of self bitterness and self hatred as well as fear issues that I was working on. Through the process of weekly prayer with my faithful Wellspring counselor and the Holy Spirit, I've been free of many things. My mind has peace, anger from generational sin is gone, and my family relationships are the best they have ever been. I sleep deeply at night and depression is gone. Some days love is bubbling up inside of me so much that I can hardly wait to pass it out to people. I'm walking out daily, watching my thoughts and learning to stay out of fear and bitterness by repenting when things come up. I've learned pain from tendonitis and herniated disc is from repressed anger and tension that can also be from stress. When I feel any pain I stop and reflect on what my day has been like and it then stops any pain that might be going on in my body, where the pain may have been. I'm learning to stay in peace so that I keep my energy levels balanced by repenting of stress and fear. Staying focused on today and don't look into the future for today has enough trouble of its' own. Thank you God for showing Art Mathias your truths on healing. Thank you Art and your staff for your love, patience and obedience. May all of you be richly blessed.” Jack Jack is an architect who had struggled in his career. He had severe issues of rejection, abandonment and fear stemming from an abusive childhood. He had always felt inadequate, and his self-esteem had been very poor. At times anger controlled him, creating problems at work. We led him through a process of forgiving all the people in his past. As God healed his broken heart, and as the pain in the past memories was healed, the anger went away. Today he is a new person, in control of his life through the power of Jesus. As we led her through the ministry, Millie learned that it was not her “duty” to please others. She learned to love herself and accept the unconditional love of God and she was healed of all the diseases. Today, Millie is living a victorious life, in triumph over the wiles of the devil. I met with Jeff and Sara together and led them through the ministry process. In the first session Jeff's nose was running, he was sneezing and could barely talk because his voice was so hoarse. I thought he had a terrible cold, but he informed me it was just allergies. By the end of the first meeting the allergies were gone and they have never come back. Each week I asked him to get his blood pressure checked. By the end of the third week it was normal. Sara was also set free of lifelong fear and dread that had affected every facet of her life. She was able to forgive situations from the past and accept God's love. The old fears and thoughts that haunted her are gone. She can relax and sit quietly for the first time in her life. If we do not deal with the issues in our lives they will deal with us. Bonnie never knew her father. She was conceived in a “one night fling.” Her mother had so many of her own problems that Bonnie became the “mother” of the family. Bonnie is half-white, so she was not accepted in either community. She had a son out of wedlock. We worked with Bonnie for about six months in our ministry process. Today she has victory. The alcoholism, panic, dyslexia and DID are gone. She now understands who she is in Christ and has learned to resist the devil. She has learned the difference between the devil's voice and God's. She no longer needs any medications. We taught Bonnie how to minister to her son, and as she did this his self-worth improved. His grades have improved from F's to C's. Bonnie is now working as a counselor, and we are making plans to minister together in addictions. We ministered to Brenda for about six months. During this process she grew tremendously in Christ. As His truth became part of her, she learned that she did not have to be afraid. She learned that there was power over Satan through Christ. She was able to reach out to her children who had rejected her. Some of the relationships have been restored. The list of her diseases gradually disappeared and today she is free of all of them. Through the teachings of Pastor Henry Wright about spiritual roots of diseases, I learned that bitterness toward a mother figure could produce breast cancer. I asked the Lord for the truth. I had breast cysts and lumps and I also thought that I had forgiven. The Lord showed me I had a deep, deep bitterness toward a family member. I purposely chose to forgive each action or word that hurt me. With each unforgiveness I dealt with, a lump went away. God and I worked together and as He revealed hurts, I would repent for not forgiving and the lumps and cysts left one by one. I had one lump left and when I dealt with that unforgiveness, it left, and I was totally free of all lumps and cysts. About a year later, the lumps started to reappear, I cried out to the Lord, “What is this?” God told me that the root of bitterness had not been completely dealt with and it was growing. I had allowed unforgiveness to creep back in with its reminder of wrongs. I knew I did not want to return to illness or to the tormentors so I took captive the unforgiveness, resentment, retaliation, anger/wrath, hate, violence, murder, and murder by tongue—all different degrees of bitterness that I was not going to allow to operate. They were not the fruit I wanted. Immediately after this, God spoke and said “Now, Marlene, get up and call (the person I had bitterness toward) and acknowledge your sin.” As I obeyed, this person burst out in tears as my confession released her of the bitterness I was holding her in. With that obedience, the principality of bitterness and every part of it was gone. That was over two years ago. It is wonderful to live in peace with God, others and myself. I praise God His Word is living and powerful and accurate. I also have been healed of sciatic nerve pain, hip joint pain, fever blisters, allergies, and back problems, as I have dealt with other issues in my life. As Evelyn grew up, she, too became addicted to alcohol and drugs and became bulimic. She was promiscuous as a teenager and a young woman. Today Evelyn is totally free of all addictions and bulimia and very active in serving the Lord. Again the story does not end here. As a young woman she became pregnant and had a son, Gary. I even went to work as office manager for an alternative doctor who promised me that he could heal my diseases. I spent many thousands of dollars for supplements, vitamin and mineral therapy, allergy elimination treatments, ozone and vitamin IV's, and I did not get well. In fact, I got sicker and had to leave the work environment. By 1992, I was on Social Security disability, unable to work, at home, depressed by the circumstances, in a brain fog, and experiencing the chronic, severe pain of fibromyalgia. I turned to the Lord, and He was waiting. He always is waiting for us to reach out to Him, you know. As my relationship with my God grew stronger, and I listened to Him more, I slowly began to heal. I realized that there was a direct correlation to my obedience - my submission - and my healing, and I was amazed at the changes the Lord was making in my life. I explained that the Social Security Administration had told me that I was entitled to benefits because my case wasn't scheduled for review for several years, and that obviously they thought I was crazy because I was turning down their money. I also told him that I didn't think the Social Security Administration understood much about integrity, but that as a woman of integrity I could not take their money when I was no longer disabled! I guess he got the message through to them because those monthly checks finally quit coming. I remained under medical care for fibromyalgia and thyroid disease. In 1996, I fell while carrying my infant grandson in his car seat, and herniated a disc in my lower back. I tried to avoid surgery through physical therapy and an exercise program for over a year. When I couldn't progress past a certain point, I had the back surgery in June of 1997, and began the recovery process with the help, of course, of anti-inflammatory drugs, pain killers, antidepressants and muscle relaxers. I was tested for sleep apnea, and it was confirmed. The specialist wanted me to wear a special positive airflow device at night to help me breath. I opted to try a jaw-repositioning device, but it caused me excruciating pain. Instead of those options, I lost 45 pounds, used two pillows to elevate my head and lungs, and took an herbal sleeping aid. I began re-entering the work world in early 1998, doing part-time temporary work through a local agency, and enjoying it very much. I also revitalized a small business of my own that had been basically dormant during my years of brain fog. In January of 1999, I got a call from my former boss and long time friend, Art Mathias. I had gone to work for Art in 1982 when he opened his State Farm office, and even though my employment there ended back in 1988, we've always kept in touch. Art began sharing with me the “good news” of the healing he'd had from God after listening to some tapes his sister had sent him. Of course, I wanted to know more. He gave me a copy of the fifteen tapes of the Wycliffe Seminar. I began to listen to them. Then, in February 1999, just a month later, I became part of the team that turned Pastor Henry Wright's “Wycliffe Seminar” into the book A More Excellent Way. During those many hours of transcribing and editing, I gained a deeper understanding of spiritual warfare. I clearly saw how the unforgiveness, bitterness, fear and anxiety in my life had directly affected my health, and in some areas, still was affecting me. I immediately began putting the Biblical principles Pastor Wright teaches into practice in my own life. Within two months, I weaned myself off ten years of prescription anti-inflammatory, and antidepressant drug therapy, and the herbal remedies I had used to help me sleep. In fact, when I heard Pastor Henry say that he claimed Proverbs 3:24 each night, I immediately began doing the same thing. I took a little computer graphic with a cat sleeping peacefully in a wicker chair, and added the scriptural promise of my Heavenly Father: “When thou liest down, thou shalt not be afraid: yea, thou shalt lie down, and thy sleep shall be sweet” (Proverbs 3:24). I framed it, and put it on my nightstand. Each night, just as I turn out the light, I read my little Scripture, praise God that I am safe because of Who He Is, and thank Him that my sleep will be sweet. Not only have I had awesome sleep, but no matter how late I turn out the light, God wakens me at 5:00 a.m. to spend time with Him before the alarm goes off. I quickly learned to look forward to this morning appointment with my Lord. He provides the energy each day regardless of the shortness of the night, because that “sweet sleep” is incredibly restorative! My thyroid function is coming back (and I've had that verified by medical testing). My fibromyalgia is gone. The “inflammatory” pain from back surgery two years ago, that I'd been told would last up to years, is gone. My allergies are a thing of the past. Gastric reflux is no longer giving me severe, angina-like, chest pain. When I do get that pressure in my chest, I know God is telling me to pay attention to my fear and anxiety levels. I meet Him in prayer and we deal with it right then and there! It works! I am thrilled to have my health returned, and my energy restored. I praise God for taking me ever deeper into His Word and for His healing! I see the Scriptures each day in new awareness, and see the blessings of obedience, and the healing of the hurting areas of my life. I am learning so much about what God desires from me in my relationship with Him. He continually provides me with the gift of peace—the peace that passeth understanding, which is the joy of the Lord. Linda's testimony was written two years ago. Today she is well and doing great! I am writing this letter to you because something very profound has happened in my life and I want to share it with of you. This will be a long note but I want to give you many of the details. Hopefully by the time I finish writing, you will be able to understand what I have experienced. I had a severe wheat allergy for twenty years. About four years ago I developed a condition called multiple chemical sensitivity/environmental illness. I went through my home and removed anything that had any type of fragrance. My basic cleaning supplies were vinegar and water. Makeup was a real problem. Being in a mall was almost impossible. Several times I suffered panic attacks because of smells I encountered. Many times in church I would have to move because of the perfumes people were wearing. After we moved to Arizona things did get better. No panic attacks and a little more tolerance for perfume, i.e. church and shopping. Now, let me begin telling you about my journey. It began with a trip to Alaska on Friday, July 28, 2000. Jim had been focused on going to Alaska all summer, so he could do some fishing. We have friends that live in Anchorage. Art and Patti Mathias have been close and dear friends for twenty years. We arrived in Anchorage Friday evening . Art and Patti picked us up and we went directly to their home. We talked for about two hours before going to bed. During those two hours I was very distressed. I felt very uncomfortable with Art and Patti. The thoughts that ran through my mind were, “This is going to be a long ten days.” I was also thinking how much they had changed, and I did not like the change. They were just tooooooooo different now. If Jim had said, “Let's go home,” I would have been on the next plane out of there. Art gently told me about his healing. I really did not want to hear about it. I knew I had allergies but they were manageable, and I did not want to delve into my past and see what the “roots” might be. Who knows, I might learn something I didn't want to know? Well, by Sunday, I could not stand it. I was feeling so tormented, angry, agitated, and so I challenged Art, “So you think you can help me!” Of course he said he could. We decided to begin the next morning at 7 am. He gave me a book Sunday evening and asked me to read the chapter on Forgiveness and to start a list of people I needed to forgive. That was not too hard. There were some people I was irritated with so I put them down. Monday morning we began with prayer and started working through my list. I am not a writer. So to try and explain to you what happened would be very difficult, but the presence of the Lord and the presence of Satan were so profound. I wept and wept. God showed me things that had happened in my life as a child that I have carried all these years. Satan has lied to me and made me believe things that were not true. When I was in the fifth grade I had a nun who thought I was dumb. She told my parents that I would never progress past the fifth grade. This was a lie I carried with me, but I needed to forgive her, and I did. (At this time, I have almost finished my masters degree.) The baggage I had carried because of these lies is incredible. I have considered myself a “normal” well-adjusted person. During that Monday session, God spoke to me and peeled away so many negative feelings. Art and I prayed after each item I had on my list. Then I waited to hear the Holy Spirit speak to me concerning that situation. He revealed so much to me. We spent about two hours working on my list. I was so tired when we finished. Tuesday morning came and even though Monday had been so wonderful, I was reluctant to get started again. Satan was whispering in my ear, “Don't go, don't go.” But of course I did, and once again our session was wonderful. Now we worked on three lists, “Forgiveness,” “Forgiveness of Myself,” and “Fears”. I never knew how many fears I had in my life. Once again after each item I prayed and waited to hear the Holy Spirit. The insights from the Holy Spirit have changed my life. During our session Art looked at me and said “You will have a ministry in this.” Me of so little faith said, “Yeah right!!”. During the Monday and Tuesday sessions we addressed my allergies. Now I was thinking, well am I healed of my allergies? So I decided to challenge them. Patti and I went to craft stores, and a craft mall. I said, let's go places that have lots of smells. We wandered these stores for hours. At times I felt the fear welling up inside of me as I smelled the candles, soaps, potpourri, etc. But now I had tools and I just stopped and prayed and the Fear went away. No no no no no allergy reactions!! In fact Patti and I were in a Michael's Craft store. We were looking in a bin for some little decorating items. Patti got her Kleenex out and blew her nose. She made a comment about the smells. I said, “What are you talking about?” Patti pointed to the bin next to us and it was filled with potpourri! I had not even noticed. Praise the Lord!! The Holy Spirit revealed to me why I was so afraid of smells. When Karen and I owned the ribbon business I became very afraid of the glue gun and what kind of health problems it might cause. I had opened the door for Satan to come in, in the form of fear. Soon I became obsessed with all smells. The Holy Spirit gave me a tool to counter Satan's lie about smells. When I smell a fragrance I think to myself, this is how Jesus smells. I feel very peaceful when I smell a fragrance. I don't plan to fill up my house with smells because I have enjoyed the passing smells so much, and the reminders of Christ's presence in my life. The Wednesday session came and went with just as many tears and revelations. Each day we spent an average of two hours per session. Another profound thing is, as I have dealt with each issue in my life I have forgotten them! If you were to ask me what was on my list I would be hard pressed to remember. All the hurts, fears, unforgiveness have been erased from my mind. On Thursday Art had to go to work early so Patti helped me with the last session, which was on the occult. There was a three-page list of things to look through. The list began with Abortion all the way to Wilheim Reich/Neo-Reichian Body Work - an A to Z list. I checked things off that I had tried and once again we went through the list item by item and prayed over each thing. (We really should have done this in the first session). I really did not have too many things checked off. But one item did come up concerning Ayurvedic Medicine. I studied this Medicine when I was taking my herb classes. It is a type of medicine practiced in India. I became very interested in it and applied it. When we came to that one on the list I became very fearful, and agitated. It became very obvious that it was a problem for me. Patti and I stopped and addressed it head on, and then we were able to move along the list with ease. So where am I today? I can smell perfume without any problems. I am eating foods without fear. I was amazed at how fearful I was of food. Even drinking a cup of coffee caused some upset for me. I would think, “Is this causing my cholesterol to go up? What about the creamers I am using, they have palm oil, and sugar.” When I ate, it was a constant dialogue about the food. That is all gone. God gave us food for our bodies. It is not harmful, but Satan had made me think so. How can a person be allergic to a food one day and not another? The food did not change, but I did. Satan told me a lie about that food. The victories continue to come forth. I am able to go anywhere I want, smell anything I want, and eat anything I want. The fears and panic attacks are also gone. Wheat was a very big issue for me. I now eat anything I want anytime. If I want wheat three times a day I eat it. No more analyzing everything I put into my mouth. No more allergy reactions. Everything has been given back to me. My life is fresh and new because I have complete freedom. Jim had to laugh the other day because I sat down and ate a Krispy Kream donut. It was hot and freshly made. After every other bite I kept saying, “yum”. I told him, “You have no idea how good this tastes. It had been at least twenty years since I have eaten a donut.” Oh, the simple pleasures of life, they are mine again. Praise the Lord for restoring me. I can't begin to tell you how freeing this experience has been. I truly feel lighter, smaller, and much more peaceful. Eight hours of intense prayer time has changed my life. I am still working on my lists. Art has taught me how to work through things on my own. Yes my list grows and grows, and each day the Lord shows me another item to add. I no longer dread the list because I know how much better I will feel after addressing the item. And like I said, after it is prayed for, I don't remember it. So now I no longer relive hurtful situations, hear those accusations about my faults, or feel guilty about past situations. They are gone!! Mary's story does not end here. As we have seen in other testimonies, the sins of the parents are passed on to our children. But thank God, so are our victories. As Mary learned the wiles of the devil, she was able break his hold on her life and now that hold has also been broken on her two daughters, Laura and Melissa. Laura and I spent several hours on the phone and she made one trip to Anchorage to see me. I have known her since she was a small child. PMS is always rooted in resentment and fear about being a female and how God created the female body to function. Mary's fears had transferred to Laura. Over a few months we worked through her fears and resentments. As we did this the PMS stopped. Laura now looks forward to this time of the month because God made her body. He made it to function in the manner He chose to cleanse itself and to reproduce. Last July she conceived and will bring a beautiful baby boy into this world in April 2002! In 1997, I came out of the summer season more bone weary than usual. I chalked it up to the fact that I was getting older. My usual two weeks went by and I wasn't regaining my usual vigor. Before I knew it, January was upon me and I was still having a difficult time bouncing back. In fact I could barely get out of bed by 9:00 a.m. and would be back on the bed napping by 2:00 p.m. My thoughts seemed to escape me often, and I was emotional much of the time. My body began to jump and jerk so badly at night that I kicked my husband off of the bed more then once. I was becoming incontinent. I never felt rested no matter how many hours I slept. I was gaining weight. Being of homesteader mentality, I figured this all would pass and by spring I would be fine. When the following May came rolling around I wasn't any better. I had a business to run and I knew I was in no mental, physical or emotional condition to do it. I went to my doctor. I had decided I must be in the throws of menopause and hormones would solve everything. Tests proved that my hormones were a little low and I began hormone replacement therapy. It helped and I began to feel better, but I never did regain my normal stamina. Each season I would increase my hormone level, find some relief, and go on. The summer of 1998 my brother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer. My husband I began traveling back and forth to Texas to spend time with him. I noticed I was still gaining weight and felt sluggish all of the time. I figured it was stress, and southern cooking. “This too shall pass”, was my motto. In the spring of 1999 when my bother-in-law went into crisis with his cancer, we went to Texas to be with him. We stayed until he passed away. His death was one in a succession of the deaths of close family members that had taken place in the previous eight years. His death seemed to be the one thing that pushed me over the edge. I hadn't lost my faith or the joy of my salvation, but I felt as if the sweetness had gone out of my life. What I didn't realize was that bitterness had replaced it. In the spring of 2000, God began to deal with me concerning my own health. I knew something was wrong. I begin to exercise, see a physical and massage therapist, and watch what I ate more closely. I knew I was losing ground healthwise but could not understand why. By now my weight was up 50 pounds and there seemed no stopping the weight-gain process. I would try to exercise and every bone in my body would ache. I thought, “Boy, Kathy, you really are out of shape.” The summer came; I had quit substituting in the winter months, so I should have been rested, ready for summer. But all I could think was, “How will I ever make it through this summer?” My hours at work had been shortened, I was in the area of my business I loved the most, and the conditions of my working environment were wonderful. My business partner began to say to me things like, “Kathy, I don't know what you're trying to say half the time. You must concentrate harder.” Then, Friday, June 16, 2000, life as I knew it came to a screeching halt. I was trying to talk to my business partner, when I realized that what was in my mind and what was coming out of my mouth were two entirely different things. I left and went to my computer and tried to type out something, but I could not. By this time I was beginning to get scared. I headed for my home and by the time I got through my front door I could not speak at all. I was unable to write a simple phone number that I had known for years. I found my husband and pointed to my lips. He surmised I couldn't speak, called my doctor, and took me to the ER. By the time I got to the hospital some of my speech had returned, but very haltingly. They diagnosed my condition as stress, gave me some tranquilizers and told me to sleep for the weekend if I could manage it. I was to see my regular doctor on Monday. When I entered my doctor's office that Monday, I still felt like I had been run over by a Mac truck. My speech was still not clear and I couldn't hold thoughts for any length of time. I tried to convince her that I needed to have my hormones upped again; after all it had always brought some relief. If it wasn't hormones, what else could it be? The hospital had ruled out that it was a stroke. She would not do it. My GP was of the opinion that no matter what had caused it, if I had not been able to speak, type or write, then I had experienced some type of neurological incident, and she ordered a MRI. It was scheduled for that afternoon. By 6:00 that evening the results had come back and my doctor ordered me back to the hospital. She was alarmed, my brain was “lit up” with random infarcts, and it appeared that I had been having these “little incidents” for quite some time. One area of the brain indicated that I had experienced a significant stroke at some point. When it had happened, they couldn't determine. The testing began; an EKG, a sonogram of my carotid artery, a second MRI, blood flow tests, and blood screening tests. The findings were minimal. My thyroid was apparently not functioning properly, and my cholesterol had gone from 180 to 280, but other than that, there didn't seem to be a significant reason for me to be having mini strokes. No source could be found. In July, I went to Seattle's Virginia Mason Diagnostic Clinic to see if they could find the source. I once again went through an extensive battery of tests; saw a heart specialist, an internist and a neurologist. Initially I was put on Synthroid for my thyroid, and Lipitor to lower my cholesterol, but it was basically a mystery why I had been having such a significant amount of stroke activity. The final blood test ordered was an anticoagulation panel. It would be 2 weeks before all the results were in. We came home. The first week of August arrived and I received a call from my internist at Virginia Mason. The blood work was back and she wanted me to get to my local GP as soon as possible. I needed to be started on heparin and Coumadin immediately. I had been diagnosed with a blood disorder called Leiden Factor V Mutation. Its cause is genetic and in my case passed to me from both parents. This disorder causes your blood to hyper-coagulate. It seems the consistency of my blood was somewhere between sorghum syrup and Elmer's glue. I was a “stroke waiting for a place to happen,” as she put it and I needed to get help NOW. I was considered at 100% risk for another stroke. So began my journey of trying to balance Coumadin, taking blood tests daily, then weekly, then monthly until my blood levels were right. In the midst of this I was having headaches daily. This was something that I had never experienced before. I spent the winter of 2000-2001 trying to get well. I could never quite get strong. I began an exercise regimen in January 2001, working out forty-five minutes to an hour twice a day. Once again, I took seriously trying to get the weight off that I had gained during the past six years. Nothing happened. In six months I lost less then four pounds and although I seemed to be getting stronger, I still did not “feel” healthy. I would look at pictures of myself and see that my eyes, instead of looking better, seemed to look worse than the first days after my initial stroke. I was doing everything I knew to do to get better. Nothing seemed to be working. As I went into the summer season of 2001, I was very aware that I still was not really healthy. My business planned for me to be there as I could, and at first I did fairly well. My menstrual cycle had been quite irregular. I began to bleed frequently. By the end of June I had bled forty out of fifty days. A sonogram was ordered of my uterus. They found a thickening of the uterine wall and ordered a biopsy of the uterine wall to rule out cancer. Praise God it came back negative. Since hormones upped my chances of clotting by 60%, my GP and I decided to lower my hormone level, and change the method of application. On July sixth, I physically crashed once again, but this time, I was reduced to being in bed for twenty hours a day. My head hurt so badly that I could not function. No amount of pain medication would lessen it. Friends, who visited me during that time, left my home concerned that I was not long for this world. My husband was beside himself, always supportive, always looking for answers, but needless to say, very worried. We decided I needed to see a hematologist and my GP agreed. This process had gotten more and more complicated and convoluted. Nothing seemed to help. I could not keep my Coumadin levels anywhere near regulated. One time it would be dangerously low, another dangerously high. I was so sick of being sick; I quit answering the question, “How are you?” On July 31st I traveled to Anchorage to meet with my hematologist. He spent 2_ hours with me, going through every detail of the past 6 years. I discovered that many of the symptoms I had attributed to hormone loss were also symptoms of stroke. He told me point blank, that if we didn't get this thing under control that it wasn't a matter of if I would have another stroke, but when. The next one might take my life. He took me off the Coumadin, put me on two injections a day of a low weight molecular heparin called “Lovenox”, and told me I needed to get off all hormones. I was devastated. I couldn't see how I could live a quality life without hormone replacement, and I had been through the injection route when first diagnosed. All I could remember was how traumatic that had been, and how glad I had been to quit giving myself shots. He said that I might feel so much better I wouldn't mind giving myself shots. I wasn't so sure. At this point I received a call from a long-time close friend. She had been having bouts with her heart and had been introduced to a ministry called Wellspring. She had been in therapy since May, and was having some real healing take place. For instance, her allergic response to ice cream disappeared. She urged me to make an appointment for the next week when I was returning to Anchorage for a follow-up visit with my hematologist. I told her no, I was too sick. I couldn't handle one more thing, and I certainly didn't need to go through any great “spiritual” searching. I just didn't have the energy. The next week she accompanied my husband and me to the doctor. She had not seen me in person since May and she was alarmed at the way I looked. She told me later that in her mind and heart she believed she was going to lose her best friend. While we were sitting in the doctor's office she asked me again if I would consider going to Wellspring. A week on the heparin had helped me a little; at least I wasn't having the headache all day everyday, and something in my spirit said, “Say yes.” Being healed of the Leiden Factor V. was not my main motivation. As far as I was concerned that wasn't the issue. I went to Wellspring because I knew that my whole system was somehow affected by the obsessive-compulsive behavior I had battled all of my life and that somehow my sickness was also tied to it. I had often said that every addiction existed in my birth family except gambling, and that is because no one lived next door to Reno. It was generational and I knew it. I just didn't know what to do with it. I had been prayed for, prayers of deliverance and healing. I had prayed them myself, but complete freedom had never come. For the previous two years something inside of me had cried out “God, there must be a better way. I am so sick. I am sick of fighting this obsessive-compulsive behavior. If it doesn't come out in eating, it comes out in smoking, or overworking, or biting my nails, or being consumed by a project to the point of unhealthiness. Your Holy Spirit has always kept my obsessive behavior in check, or brought me back when I have strayed, but there must be a better way. Will I have to live with this thing just under the surface for the rest of my life? I am sick and getting sicker, help me.” Somewhere down deep in my spirit I knew it was related to my health issues, but I had no idea how. My friend called Wellspring to make an appointment. Art had no openings, but because of his mercy, and the concern in my friend's voice, he agreed to meet us for lunch the next day. That day was the day that put hope in my heart for the first time in years. We simply sat at a table and Art began to explain what Wellspring does. The Holy Spirit showed up in a very powerful way. Though this wasn't a “session”, God used this hour lunch to plant a seed of hope in my heart. There were no openings until August 27. I was dismayed, but as always, God knew what He was doing. I went home and began to read the book Biblical Foundations of Freedom. I began to make bitterness lists, against others and against myself. (When I tell people that, most say. “Kathy, you are the last person I would think of as bitter.” Only those who knew me well knew the bitterness I felt over my brother-in-law's death. It brought about the downward swing in my health. It was the proverbial “straw,” laid on top of all the other things that I had held in my heart against others and myself, that made the house come tumbling down.) I walked into the Wellspring office on August 27. That was the beginning of new life for me. After the first session, I went home to my friend's house to discover that for the first time in about ten years the Word of God was alive to me again. My headache went away. (And as of this writing I have never been plagued with it again). By the second session my eyes were looking different. Two days after that session I took my grandkids to the State Fair. I spent all day with them. It had been the first time in over three years that I could play with them, really enjoy them, and not be absolutely exhausted. I had set aside two weeks in Anchorage to see my hematologist and attend as many therapy sessions as I could. My husband came to Anchorage over the Labor Day weekend. He was amazed at my energy level and how I looked. That next week I went back to my hematologist. He told me that at my choosing I could go down to one shot a day. I knew that I was not ready to do that yet. I knew the root of the thing that was killing me was not broken, but that it was close to being exposed. Although the Ministry seldom has cancellations, they had two during the time I needed. At my fourth session, the root of all my self-hate and self-bitterness was exposed, repented of, and broken. The obsessive-compulsive spirit was broken. I went through what I call a complete melt down. Praise God, He is faithful. I returned home on September 5. I have not felt this healthy in six years. People who see me can't believe the change. Within the first week I lost nine pounds. I did nothing to make it happen except continue to work through the Biblical Foundations of Freedom. I know it is because my endocrine system is finally working for me not against me. On September 11, I went in for my six-month blood work. My thyroid and hormone levels are normal for the first time in three years; before, even with the medication, I could not attain good levels. My cholesterol is great, even though I have been off Lipitor for six months. I look forward to my next set of blood work. I know that as I continue to grow in my healing, things will only get better. God is faithful. He will hear your heart's cry. He does heal today. As Art says: “This isn't rocket science. It is simply putting the principles of God into practice.” I feel like the blind man Jesus healed in the Synagogue. When he and his parents were questioned about how his healing had taken place, his answer was this, “All I know is, once I was blind and now I see.” For me it is, “All I know is, once I was sick and dying and now I am well.” |
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